Forgettable Tale...

Get to Keldagrim — the Blast Furnace teleport, the Grand Exchange cart trapdoor, or the fairy ring — and talk to Commander Veldaban in the Black Guard HQ west of the bank.

There is no range in Keldagrim, so cook the barley into malt before you arrive, and no tool leprechaun, so bring the dibber.

The drunken dwarf gives you the first seed.

The Rowdy dwarf circling the Laughing Miner pub, directly south of the drunken dwarf's house, wants a random item for the second.

Get the other seeds from Khorvak and Gauss before leaving Keldagrim to fetch whatever the rowdy dwarf asked for — it saves a round trip.

The hops patch is in front of the palace in West Keldagrim, east of the bank. Ask Rind the gardener for permission — kelda seeds only grow underground.

Rake the patch, plant the hops, and wait 15 to 20 minutes. You need not stay online, but logging in and out resets the timer.

• Rake

Ask the southernmost cart conductor, nearest the boarded tunnel, about it — only that one has the option.

Then ask the director of the mining company you joined in The Giant Dwarf, upstairs in either marketplace, to have the boards removed.

Ride the southernmost cart into the new tunnel. No ticket is needed.

Report to Veldaban, then buy a kebab from the store south-west of the drunken dwarf's house and a beer from the east pub.

Do not eat or drink before you have spoken to Veldaban. Doing so skips the cutscene that starts the ending.

Drink and eat in the east pub to trigger the final scene.